Salem's adventures in the Loud House
by Smoking Wrecker
Summary: One talking cat, one boy in a house full of hens. What can go wrong. Co-written with DarthWill3. Putting it back on,
1. Chapter 1

Okay, this is something DarthWill3 and I both came up with involving our favorite talking cat, Salem Saberhagen. I don't own The Loud House or Sabrina the Teenage Witch.

* * *

One morning, Lincoln walked through the kitchen and sighed. "Oh, hey," he said, noticing the readers. "You're probably wondering what's going on, huh? Well, Ronnie Anne and her family moved away, and I had to wear a Royal Woods Squirrel suit because my family thought I was bad luck. Not in that order."

He then opened the fridge and grabbed a pudding cup. "But here's something you didn't know about," he continued while closing the fridge. "When my family sold my furniture, it was at an online auction. And guess who the highest bidder was…"

A black cat sat nearby on the counter, its tail swinging back and forth patiently. "Hey, Linc, can you be a pal and open the fridge?" came the baritone voice from its mouth. "There's a full bottle of milk begging me to put it outta its misery."

"Nice try, Salem," said Lincoln, his arms crossed. "You know that turkey's meant for dinner tonight. And that includes everyone on the table."

"C'mon, do I look like a cat burglar to you?"

Lincoln gave Salem a pointed look.

"Right... Bad choice of words, obviously." With that, Salem leaped off the counter and walked out of the kitchen.

Lincoln pointed a sideways thumb in the direction of the black quadruped. "Meet Salem Saberhagen," he explained to the readers. "He won my stuff off the auction—heck, he was the only one who bothered to show up—and the first thing that comes to your mind is: Why does he talk?"

As the boy spoke, he headed for the living room. There, Salem was lying down on the couch, watching TV. The remote control rested beside his right paw.

"At first glance," continued Lincoln, his back towards Salem, "he looks like a talking cat. But that's only half the story. He's a warlock who masterminded the Witch Water Scandal: an attempted insurrection to take over the world."

Salem clearly overheard Lincoln, for he looked upwards at the ceiling, remembering fondly. "Ah, Witch Water: my Austerlitz… and my Waterloo." He let out a quiet whimper on that last word.

"Yep," Lincoln stated, dryly. "For that little foul-up, he was sentenced by some 'Witches Council' to a hundred years as a Witch Familiar; in this case, a cat."

"A hundred and fifty."

Lincoln raised an eyebrow. "Come again?"

Salem cleared his throat before elaborating, "One time, my essence was transferred into a high school kid's body. Long story short, I tried to have the principal run for senator, but that landed Sabrina in trouble. Had to turn myself in and accept fifty more years."

"Okay, so—"

"Actually, it was a gubernatorial campaign. I didn't have the time to plan my next move. Look, you wanna make a documentary, keep your facts straight."

"I'm not making a documentary, I'm just—" Lincoln shook his head in exasperation. "Oh, never mind. Salem, now that you're living in this house, you've gotta learn a few things so you can survive."

"Survive what?" scoffed Salem. "Given my extremely extensive experience, I'll bet I've been through worse."

Amused, Lincoln raised an eyebrow. "Did I just hear the word bet?"

"You did. Now beat it. I'm watching the best cupcakes in the world get frosted on Operation: Dessert Storm."

Salem licked his chops at the sight of such delectable pastries on a 32" screen. His yellow eyes sparkled with wonder, his tail wagging excitedly. A faint num-num could be heard under his breath.

"Cooking shows. Probably one of Salem's favorite TV genres." Lincoln sighed as he began to walk upstairs. "The second thing you're probably asking is: How can he be still around even if this family's labeled 'non-magic?' There are two answers to that question."

Once Lincoln reached the second floor, he casually strolled to his room, all the while eying the readers. "First of all, the last witch that Salem was living with had enough of his impulse buying, my furniture being on his last shopping list there. He was sent on the day we came back from the beach when I was the family's good luck charm."

* * *

 **Sorry, guys, but I have to cut it short. I'll include the flashback in the next chapter. In the meantime, I would like to thank DarthWill3 for helping me with beginning of the story. Please review.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you all so much for the positive feedback. This story is the very first crossover between** _ **Sabrina the Teenage Witch**_ **and** _ **The Loud House**_ **, so it's understandable that reviews have been rather slow on this website. So far, the favorites and followings equal each other in number (8).**

 **Dragonshadow97: That was pretty much the whole idea. And it's not everyday you get the words "feel good" in an episode such as "No Such Luck."**

 **Fireball Disaster: To answer your totally unrelated question,** _ **Crystal Louds**_ **is now reuploaded. Call it an improvement on the last one.**

 **Nanairo the Keyblade Samurai: Ooh… Someone clearly knows their** _ **Sabrina**_ **. The episode in question is titled "Thin Ice."**

 **Willow x Oz: You'll find out soon enough.**

 **Okay, get ready for an origin story of how Salem got to the Loud House.**

 _A pair of yellow eyes appeared in the dark. They looked left, right and back again._

 _"Where am I?" asked Salem. "Why is it dark in here? I can't see my own paws!"_

 _Just then, he could hear the faint patter of footsteps from afar, followed closely by a familiar hum._

Teenage girls, _he thought, shuddering._ Okay, you've been through this sort of thing. Just keep your mouth shut and wait it out. See what happens.

 _The line of internal monologues was briefly interrupted by a small grumbling._

Wonder if there's any chow around here…

* * *

 _"That was a literally good beach day," mused Lori as she and Leni entered their room. "I don't know about you, but Lincoln sure kept a lot of bad luck away, suit or no suit."_

 _"You said it," affirmed the younger sister, closing the door behind her. "Think of all the things we didn't get: broken glass, crab claws, snapping turtles, sharks…"_

 _Lori briefly flashed a palm at Leni. "Let me stop you right there. Sharks?_ Really, _Leni? Everybody knows that there are no sharks in Michigan."_

 _"Oh yeah? Then what about those bull sharks I've heard that can totes go into sea_ and _fresh water?"_

 _"They only travel as far as Illinois… or whatever that documentary said."_

 _Leni mopped her forehead. "Like, phew. Hate to meet one of those bull sharks. I dunno what would be worse: the teeth or the horns."_

 _Lori had nothing further to say on the subject. She just rolled her eyes before heading for the closet._

 _"Now where did I put those new shoes…?"_

 _Upon opening the door, she turned on the lights and looked down. Almost instantly, she screamed with the utmost horror and scurried to her bed._

 _"Black cat! Black cat!"_

No kidding, Blondie _, Salem thought._

 _"How did a cat get in here?" Leni asked._

 _"No idea!" stated Lori. "But we'd better throw it out, just to be safe!"_

 _Leni cringed. "Throw it out? Like,_ out the window? _Wouldn't that hurt the little guy?"_

 _"No, Leni, I mean we should chase it out of the house."_

Don't panic, Saberhagen. Just give them the old charm. Here goes nothing…

 _Salem walked up to Leni, then began to purr and nuzzle her leg._

 _"Aw, that is totes adorable!" Leni cooed, picking up Salem gently. She held him against her shoulder and begins stroking him._

 _"Aren't you just, wike, the cutest wittle kitty ever? Yes, you are. Yes, you are."_

 _Salem let the girl's fingers run through his fur._ Oh, that's the spot. Sabrina always stroked me like this. Now she's gonna wish she never kicked me out. But hey: her loss, my gain.

 _"Leni, are you insane?" exclaimed Lori. "We don't know where that cat came from! It could have rabies!"_

 _"What rabbits?" queried Leni, looking around. "I don't see any."_

 _The eldest Loud sibling put a palm to her face. "Okay, let me put this another way. Maybe you've forgotten that black cats are bad luck?"_

 _Leni giggled. "Oh, Lori. We have a black cat in our house and_ he _doesn't give us bad luck. Not even on Friday the 13th."_

 _"That's because Cliff has patches of cream-colored fur on his face." Lori pointed a finger at Salem. "This is a literally black cat, from head to toe."_

Guilty as charged, _thought Salem, a smug grin daring to beam from ear to ear._

 _Marching to the door, Lori flung it open wide and pointed outside. "And that's why it has to go! Move it, fleabag!_ Scram! _No strays allowed!"_

 _Salem narrowed his eyes into the best glare he could muster._ Who you callin' a "stray?"

 _"Don't wisten to that mean wady, kitty," soothed Leni, placing Salem on her bed. "She's just not used to stwangers wike I am."_

 _"Lori, could you keep it down?"_

 _Lori turned to see Lynn walking down the hallway and towards the room._

 _"Some of us are trying to do some bench preps in peace," Lynn complained, stopping right next to the eldest sister. "I swear, your shouting could put Luna's guitar practice to—"_

 _A yelp of panic put an end to her ranting the second she spotted Salem atop the pinkish blanket of Lori's mattress. "Black cat!" And she ran off in a flash._

Huh, _mused Salem internally._ What's the worst that kid can do? It's not like she's gonna come after me with a hockey stick.

 _At that moment, Lynn came right back dressed from head to kneecaps in hockey gear, the stick firmly in both hands. She let out a fierce war cry whilst going for the kill._

¿Qué? _Salem's eyes widened. He sprinted off the bed, narrowly missing the business end of the stick. No time was lost in exiting through the door and entering the hallway._

Me and my big mouth of a brain!

 _"Get back here!" Lynn shouted, following the black cat out._

 _"Run, kitty, run!" urged Leni._

* * *

 _"Hey, Linc!" Clyde called whist opening the front door. "You home? The guys told me about the Squirrels game and I wanted to congratulate— What the...?"_

 _A small, black shape rushed down the stairs, with a hostile Lynn on his tail._

Hold the door, kid, _thought Salem._ Just a few secs and I'm home free! Yeehaw!

 _"Clyde!" hollered Lynn. "Shut the door!_ Quick! _"_

 _"Um… Okay?" Clyde grabbed a hold of the knob and pulled, letting the door slam behind him with a loud bang._

Veer left! Veer left! _And that's what Salem did, dashing past the puzzled Clyde and into the dining room._

 _Onto the cloth of the grown-up's table the cat leapt, and Lynn hurled the hockey stick in a harpooner-like fashion. Salem quickly jumped out of the way, causing the projectile to continue its course towards the window._

 _There was a shattering crash._

 _Just then, Salem spotted the flap of Charles' doggie door from the kitchen entrance._ Well, whaddya know? _he thought._ An escape hatch fit for a cat!

 _He made a break for it, nearly slipping on the tile floor. But as he got under the flap, he could go no further. He was jammed halfway through._

 _Why did I eat that whole leg of beef last night?_

 _Lynn had fetched the hockey stick from the window and entered the kitchen. "Gotcha now, cat," she growled, walking over to the bottom half of Salem's body. "Time for you to make a bigger exit…"_

 _On the other side, Salem shut his eyes. Any sobbing he might've elicited could only be heard in his head._

 _Lynn raised the stick 180° over her right shoulder, preparing the final hitter as she shouted out, "Fore!"_

 _"Stop!" uttered a familiar monotone from nearby, with a higher pitch than usual._

 _Lynn shrieked, involuntarily shooting the stick from her hands into the single lightbulb. Another scene of broken glass ensued, albeit at a smaller scale, followed by tiny sparks. The stick landed on the tiles with a clatter._

" _Oh boy," murmured Clyde, standing at the kitchen entrance._

" _What's going on in there?" called a matriarchal voice._

" _Nothing of my doing, Mrs. Loud!" Clyde answered hurriedly._

 _Unfazed by the sudden accident or her mother's voice, Lynn turned to the goth girl standing a foot away from her._

 _"What gives, Lucy?!" she blurted, lifting the visor of her mask. "I was about to rid the house of an unlucky fur ball!"_

 _"I'm not letting you harm this Witch Familiar."_

 _"Witch Familiar?"_

 _Lucy didn't answer. She just walked up to Salem and pulled him out of the flap, placing him gently into her arms._

 _"Oh, thank you!" Salem cheered as he gave Lucy some kisses. "Thank you, thank you, thank you! That maniac was going to use me as the first kitty golf ball!"_

 _Lynn and Clyde blinked._

" _Am I hearing things?" asked Clyde, rubbing his ears. "Cos if I am, I'll need someone more qualified than Dr. Lopez."_

" _Did… that cat just… talk?" Lynn struggled to say._

 _Almost as if by magic, the rest of the Loud family appeared into the kitchen, stopping an inch away from the tiny bits of glass on the tiles. Luna could be seen holding Lily._

 _"What's this about a talking kitty?" Lola inquired._

" _And one smart little witch," added Salem, tilting his head sideways toward his rescuer._

 _Lucy stared directly at the cat. "What… did you just… call me?"_

" _Um, you're a witch._ Duh. _How else could you have identified me as a Witch Familiar?"_

 _Salem turned to the rest of the family, laughing to himself. "Of course, this_ is _a magic family I'll be living with. Surely Sabrina must've zapped you a letter to let you know I was coming. Right?"_

 _Not a reply was to be heard. Everyone from every angle peered in Salem and Lucy's direction._

" _Right?"_

 _The silence continued to linger for a few seconds until Luna said, "Um… We're pretty much_ zilch _on magic, dude."_

" _Incredible," mused a stunned Lisa. "Simply incredible. This is most disconcerting to my usually rational mind."_

" _I'm a witch?" Lucy sounded as if she were asking more to herself than to the cat in her arms. "I'm. A. Witch? For_ real? _"_

" _I know this might sound cliché," interjected Salem, "but I'll just go ahead and say it: awkward…"_

* * *

"And now we come to the second answer of Question No. 2," Lincoln told the readers, his hands under the running faucet of the bathroom sink. "Where Salem comes from, Witch Familiars are assigned to magic families until they've served their time. He was lucky to be dropped off at a home that has a witch: my little sister Lucy."

He turned off the tap, then reached for the towel. "It all makes sense with her popping out of nowhere and her so-called 'obsession' with ghosts, vampires, anything that jumps outta Halloween… Turns out to be a witch trait.

"Doesn't make the willies any smaller, though."

Shuddering slightly, Lincoln exited the bathroom and shut the door. He began shaking his head as though to exorcise this feeling of dread.

"Okay, I'm better now," he spoke with assurance. "It's been over a month, and my head's still reeling with this new reality. We're not all as emotionally detached as Lisa.

"Last week, we found a magic guide called _Ancient Book of Spells_ owned by Great Grandma Harriet. Before you ask, no; she was _not_ a witch. She just had this big appeal for the netherworld… or the Other Realm, as Salem calls it."

Lincoln walked a few steps before halting outside Lynn and Lucy's room. "Lucy's the real _deal_ in this family," he stated, pointing to the door. "As for Lynn—"

"UGH, I DON'T BELIEVE THIS!"

Startled by the muffled, though familiar voice, Lincoln ran back downstairs.

He stopped halfway to find Lynn exiting the house with a large, heavy bag on her back. She turned to her side to reveal a gas mask on her face and her hands strapped into rubber gloves.

"How much does that cat eat?" she complained, dropping the bag. " _What_ does he eat? Mexican food? Just because he has a big litter box doesn't mean he can fill every inch of it!"

A chuckle in the form of "He-he-he" could be heard from the couch. The first two syllables were of an even note, the last about two octaves higher.

"Keep up the good work, Junior! Remember: we've got some claws that need filing tomorrow!"

Lincoln ignored Salem as he returned his attention to the readers. "Lynn's overreaction to Salem's debut was the last straw. Two different series of bad luck in one week? Right now, she's grounded for three months: one month for destroying the dining room window and the kitchen light; two for assaulting a Witch Familiar protected by the Humane Society."

He shrugged his shoulders. "Who knows? Since she's been doing every one of our chores, maybe she'll get time off for good behavior…"

Once more upstairs, the only male child of the Louds went.

"Keeping Salem quiet around what the Other Realm refer to as 'mortals' isn't much of an issue; he's a pro at this sort of thing, if you can call him a pro at _anything._ The same applies to Lucy, as far as her magic's concerned. Just so you know, Clyde's been sworn to secrecy from that day on. I couldn't have asked for a better pal.

"But he's not the only mortal outside the family who's in on it…"

 **A/N: Didn't see any of this coming, did you?**

 **Because Salem has showed up in the immediate aftermath of "No Such Luck," you can expect that things in Season 2 would've been altered in one way or another. We won't be doing any rewrites of specific episodes, but references shall be mentioned, along with a few flashbacks.**

 **Sorry again for cutting this pilot short. Ever since I uploaded it prematurely, DarthWill3 and I have had to "salvage this whole mess by improvising." (His words, not mine.) Part 3 will be the final nail before we move on to one-shot episodes. Scout's honor.**


	3. Chapter 3

A/ **N: Sorry for the long wait, folks. As some of you may have noticed, there a lotof other fan fics that need my attention. Now that it's a new year, things are bound to get a lot busier.**

 **But enough about my writing dilemma. Let me thank you all for giving the previous chapter five positive reviews upon the day of its publication. It means so much to me and DarthWill3. Right now, we have 20 follows, 17 reviews and 16 favorites.**

 **Dragonshadow97: A triple karma combo, eh? Well, if we forgo any further video game lingo, let me say you're right on the mark. Considering the number of a post-NSL fanfics, this was possibly the most humane, humiliating and humorous punishment we could think of for Lynn, not to mention the fastest way to get her into that mess.**

 **nightmaster000: I'm afraid there won't be any characters from the animated Sabrina series, but we can make at least one reference from it concerning Salem's human days. As for the characters in the original sitcom, there willbe a few guest appearances, so hold on tight.**

 **Willow x Oz and Navy Apocalypse 321: I think you may have missed the last bit in Part 1 of the pilot which mentions Salem being evicted from Sabrina's house due to his impulse buying. You know how he is when it comes to using other people's credit cards. As to Sabrina being out of character in that regard, you might want to look back to the sitcom's Season 5 finale for some answers.**

 **Fireball Disaster: By "manners," I assume you mean either Salem purring at Leni's leg or his treating Lynn as if she were his servant. He'd appreciate it.**

 **DreadedCandiru2: You're about to find out, my friend.**

 **Now, with all that out of the way, here is the final part of the pilot.**

 _Bobby walked into the kitchen and stopped upon spotting a miniature glittery pyramid on the right of the fridge. The entrance was flanked by miniature gold sphinxes. Miniature palm trees surrounded the structure. There was a tiny satellite dish on top, as if there might be a little television set inside._

 _"That is one weird litter box," Bobby wondered aloud. He shrugged before opening the freezer and rummaging through, unaware of a black cat entering the room._

 _It sure was nice of Hilda to have Sabrina zap this baby over here yesterday,thought Salem as he strolled towards the litter more sharing open outhouses with Cliff._

 _It was only a few seconds before Bobby brought his head out of the freezer. "Wouldn't you know it?" he groaned. "No ice."_

 _Almost instantly, his eyes gazed upon an empty ice cube tray on top of the fridge, leaning hard to starboard. The only course available to him was to take a side step or two left, reach for the utensil, put it into the sink, turn the cold-water faucet and let the freezer do the rest._

 _Salem was halfway into the litter box, his tail sticking out, when an oblivious sneaker found its mark._

 _"WHOOOOOAHOHOHOHO!"_

 _Upon making such a howl, the small black body immediately disappeared into the box, its rear appendage yanked from the sneaker's loaded grasp._

 _Bobby, startled by the noise, quickly turned around. His eyes widened to find the pyramid he was standing next to rise a foot in the air. A split second later, it crashed back onto solid ground. A few patches of sand escaped through the entrance, as if a dragon were belching its flammable contents._

 _"Haunted litter box!" Bobby shouted as he scampered out of the kitchen. "Babe! Where's the broom?!"_

 _The natural response which would have come could not be heard coherently, for it was drowned by a brief, pitiful series of sobs from inside the box. "My beautiful tail!" Then came a long groan. "And my head… Ow."_

 _Almost instantly, Lori stood before the entrance of the kitchen, arms and legs stretched out frantically to act as a one-woman barricade._

 _"Boo-Boo Bear," she pleaded, "calm down. I know you wanna protect me—and that's really, reallysweet of you—but there's literally no cause for alarm."_

 _"Outta my way, babe!" ordered Bobby, holding out a broom as if he were ready to fix bayonets and charge at the enemy. "I'm gotta cast out this evil demon once and for all!"_

 _"Look, I can explain—"_

 _But before Lori could, Salem's head popped out of the litter box, bits of sand covering his face. "Whichever one of you smart alecks caused this owes me a bath! Pronto!Extra sudsy!"_

 _Suddenly, he noticed an astounded Bobby staring at him over Lori's shoulder. The grips on his broom loosened, letting it smack on the floor. Lori reacted with a gulp before giggling nervously, perspiration evident on her face._

 _All the nervous cat could utter was, "Uh… Le mew?"_

"You might say," Lincoln said annoyingly to the readers, "that Salem should've kept his mouth shut and head inside once he heard Lori and Bobby talking about—oh, I don't know—maybe five feet awayfrom him?" He placed a palm to his face before resuming a more casual tone. "But to be honest, I can't really blame him. The pain done to his tail, with the additional headache from hitting the litter box roof, must've made the birds flying around him chirp extra loudly.

Lincoln proceeded to return downstairs, albeit at a leisurely pace. "You'd imagine the Witches Council summoning Salem to court and having Bobby's memory wiped of the whole thing. It wasn't the first time he let it slip to a mortal that he's a talking cat. Luckily, Lucy's a rare mortal-born witch, which grants her a few privileges that any pureblood witch could killfor."

There was a momentary pause before Lincoln added hurriedly, "Not that they'd really doit, you understand."

With a sheepish chuckle, he walked behind the living room couch towards the small two-drawer cabinet, an index finger reaching for the cellphone that rested beside the lamp. The phone's background picture of Natalie Portman and icons were on display, which indicated recent usage.

"Ever since that day," smiled Lincoln, skimming the phone, "Bobby and Salem became fast friends. You should see the number of selfies they've taken. It's like the time me and Bobby hung out, only a little more restricted when 'NO PETS' signs are concerned."

As he talked, various pictures Salem and Bobby were brought up, swiped from one photo to another. One showed the two of them sharing a big pizza. Another was taken at the beach, with the talking cat wearing sunglasses alongside Lifeguard Santiago. The third entailed Bobby next to the fountain at Ketcham Park, holding a small fish net full of wet coins; Salem could be seen clinging to the net, eyes fixed on the shining treasure.

Then with a press of the "EXIT" button, the pictures disappeared.

"When Salem heard that the Santiagos were moving out to the city…" Lincoln hesitated for a moment, a hand scratching the back of his head. "Well, I didn't see his reaction, but I heard a lotof it."

 _Salem gave off a hysterical yell as he jumped from the window of Lisa and Lily's room and onto the roof of Vanzilla. He landed nimbly on his feet, then lay down on his belly._

 _"Houston, we have made contact!" he cheered, just as the van was beginning to vibrate._

 _"While impressed with the near-impossible feat you have just achieved," Lisa called, struggling to get her head out the window, "I must heavily advise against the next one you are about to—"_

 _Vanzilla's engine roared as she exited the driveway in a flash, taking Salem with her._

 _"Wish I'd installed a camera on that roof," cursed Lisa to herself. "Physical research of this kind would've been invaluable…"_

 _The child prodigy was nearly knocked over the edge as Leni rushed over to the window, crying out, "Salem! Like, come back!"_

 _Salem didn't hear Leni. He was too far away and far too busy clinging to the front of Vanzilla's roof for dear life. His claws sunk into the metal with every sharp point they had._

 _"I'M COMING, BOBBY!" he shouted at the top of his lungs._

 _Then out of nowhere a pigeon hits Salem in the face knocking him off Vanzilla, he screams and lands in a bush. As Vanzilla drove away Salem poked his head out of the bushes and spits feathers out of his mouth._

 _Sometime later Salem walked back home and decided to let Lincoln and Lori get Bobby back._

 _Later that Salem is watching Thor when he hears the door opens and sees Lincoln and Lori enter. "You made it! Did you bring back Bobby?" Salem asked._

 _"Actually he's staying with his extended family in Great Lakes city." Lincoln said._

 _"What?" Salem asked._

 _"He and his family are going to stay in the city and we're going to do a long distance relationship." Lori replied._

 _"Can you two bend down to my eye level please." Salem said and when the two Loud kids do that Salem gives them a slap across the face with his paw._

 _"Ow!" Lori cried out. "Your claws were out!"_

 _"You had one job! Bring my best friend back and you blew it! Like Geogre Lucas did with the Prequels!" Salem shouted._

 _"Ronnie Anne wanted to stay there." Lincoln stated._

 _"Then it's her fault too!" Salem shouted. "Now I'll never see my best friend again." Salem started crying harder than Sally Fields and runs away._

 _"Should we talk to him?" Lincoln asked._

 _"Let him cool off he's literally being a big baby again it." Lori said._

We cut back to the present. "Yep Salem got mad and got Lisa to install a lock, which is why I've been bunking with Lori. Until my parents told Salem to let me back in my room." Lincoln explained.

"And I was enjoying my peace without you!" Salem said.

"Do you ever shut up?" Lincoln groaned.

Then the doorbell rings and Lincoln walks towards the door and answers it, only to

Have his eyes widened. "Hey Lame-o." said Ronnie Anne.

"Ronnie Anne? What are you doing back here?" Lincoln asked.

"I'm back in Royal Woods Linc." said Ronnie Anne.

"What about the Bodega?" Lincoln asked.

"Actually the bank foreclosed on the old Bodega and for some unknown reason another shop was for sale back in Royal Woods, so the whole family is back here." said Ronnie Anne.

Lincoln looked at Salem who was getting shifty eyes. "Will you excuse me for a minute I need to make sure my new cat has no problems with his eyes." Lincoln said and picked up Salem, then proceeded to walk upstairs and enters Lori and Leni's room and finally shuts the door.

"What's going on?" Lori asked. "I was texting Bobby and giving him welcome back kisses."

"Salem has something to do with that don't you Salem?" Lincoln asked.

"Yes I did." Salem sighed. "I had some connections over at the Great Lakes City banks and realtors of Royal Woods and had them take away their home. But I only did it because I wanted Bobby back. Please don't tell the Witches' council." Salem begged.

"Thank you Salem!" Lori Hugged the kitty. "I wasn't able to do the long distance thing. Tell you what. Tomorrow I'll take you to Burpin Burger and get you a large combo."

"Finally I get rewarded instead of being punished." Salem cheered.

Then Lincoln gets a text from Ronnie Anne. "Looks like Ronnie Anne and I are going to the arcade." said Lincoln.

"I'll drive you two down there so I can see my Boo Boo Bear." said Lori.

The two exited the room leaving Salem all by himself. He then turns to the audience. "Well folks I hope you enjoyed the story of how I got to this house full of hens. Not only did I made a new friend, but I have a new witch to teach my wisdom to. Well the story's over, now go outside and play." Salem said.

"SALEM! YOU SPEND 500 DOLLARS ON SOME MODEL STATUE!" Rita shouted.

"Uh oh!" Salem's eyes widened. "Gotta run!" Salem then jumps towards the window to escape but sadly it was close. "Dang it."

 **Well folks there you have it the pilot to this story. Which is why I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that the story is not cancelled it's back. The bad news is I'm gonna keep this up for about 12 or 25 more episodes. That's how much I'm gonna do. Please read and review.**


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